A and B stand near the entrance to and/or in line in the Perelman Cafe. A grandly steps out and loudly begins to sing “Food Glorious Food”---from “Oliver”
[center]A: Food glorious food
Hot sausage and mustard
While we're in the mood cold jelly and custard
Pease pudding and saveloys
What next is the question?
Rich gentlemen have it boys
[center]A: Food glorious food
We’re anxious to try it
Three banquets a day
Our favorite diet
Just picture a great big steak fried, roasted or stewed
Oh food marvelous food wonderful food magical food
fabulous food beautiful food
B: Look, we may be in the cafeteria, but we’re still in an art museum. Philadelphia Assembled changed up the menu and chefs, but it’s part of a whole project. If you want to sing about food, sing about health and nutrition---
A grandly and loudly sings “The Candyman”---from “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory”
[center]A: Who can take a sunrise (who can take a sunrise)
Sprinkle it with dew (sprinkle it with dew)
Cover it with choc'late and a miracle or two
The Candy Man (the Candy Man)
Oh, the Candy Man can (the Candy Man can)
Who can take a rainbow
Wrap it in a sigh
Soak it in the sun
and make a strawberry lemon pie?[/center]
B: The Candyman?
A: The Candyman
The Candyman can
The Candyman can cause he mixes it with love and makes the world taste good
B: I said healthy food. Did you know that nearly 30 million Americans lack access to healthy, affordable food?
A: My bad. Vegetables would be good, right?
A breaks into Michael Franks’ “Eggplant”
[center]A: When my baby cooks her eggplant
She don’t read no book
She’s got a Giaconda kinda dirty look…[/center]
B: We don’t need Michael Franks. We need food solutions...Before Michelle Obama’s Fresh Food Financing Initiative began in early 2010, Philadelphia had the lowest per-capita rate for access to supermarkets in the U.S. And across the Delaware River, New Jersey has 134 ‘food deserts’ and Delaware has 15.
[center] A: I can’t reveal her name but eggplant--is her game[/center]
B: If you stopped freakin’ singing maybe you could help people. Did you know that Philabundance provide food to approximately 90,000 people per week – of which 30% are children and 15% are senior citizens – through their network of nearly 350 member agencies including food cupboards, shelters, emergency kitchens and more?
A breaks into “Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off”
[center]A: You say either and I say either
You say neither and I say neither
B: You don’t want to help, do you?
[center]A: You like potato and I like potahto
You like tomato and I like tomahto
Potato, potahto, tomato, tomahto
Let's call the whole thing off![/center]
B: Your words, thank God, not mine.
A: Actually they’re George Gershwin and Ira Gershwin’s.
B: You could help glean.
A: Clean? I don’t do cleaning. No windows for me…
B: ‘Glean. G-l-e-a-n.’
A: I don’t think I do that either. I’m engaged!
B: Gleaning--gleaning. It’s picking and harvesting excess fresh produce from farms.
A: Alright, gleaning! Don’t look at me like that. I have a reputation you know.
B: I know.
They exit into the courtyard to inspect the plants.
Mona R. Washington is a graduate of Georgetown University's School of Foreign Service and Harvard Law School. She is a proud member of Voices of Our Nations Arts (VONA). Her plays have been performed in New York, Philadelphia, Rome, and Paris. She's been awarded fellowships at The Djerassi Foundation, The Dora Maar House (Provence, France), The Ucross Foundation, and The Jack Kerouac House, amongst others. Queries regarding performance rights for plays may be directed to firstname.lastname@example.org .